recipe for turning challenges into triumphs

Some days go so smoothly, it would be awesome if we could "can" it for further use. Create a nice neat little recipe to have more smooth awesome days.

What happens when you are building a business, building a house, working a job, dealing with a very ill parent, missing your children, lose a job, get a divorce, lose a loved one, go bankrupt, a spouse or child becomes very ill or any of the other painful life situations that we get thrown at us.

Life doesn't always get handed to us in a neat little package. There are moments in time, in everyone's life where they will be handed a deck of cards, that they are very uncertain of what to do with.

They won't be a winning hand. There won't be a trick to play them perfectly, so you will still come out the winner. Some times life delivers sad moments, hurtful moments, and frustration in bundles. Then what?

It's a great thing that we can in a way, create a recipe for a better life. That we can do small things, daily to sustain and nurture our soul so that when life get's dirty, we have the tools to hold it together.

It doesn't mean you won't have breakdowns. Being truly present is accepting, listening, and acknowledging all of our emotions. Being in that moment with whatever emotion is there. We have a whole bag of them, and none of them should be neglected. They all serve a purpose.  Whether it is to show us something, teach us, or grow us. There is a reason for every life story. It's a gift that if we open ourselves up to it, we will cherish for a life time.

Feeling, being emotional, taking a time out, giving yourself space are all ways to handle the various emotions that will overwhelm you at one point or another in your life. Life's not always a giant basket of chocolate. Gosh darn it...Wouldn't that be fabulous. I like Dark Chocolate best...:)

When life gets crazy, do you have a recipe to re-fill your own soul, both physically and emotionally? It's important on the great days, and especially the average days that you make, create, and implement a plan that will fuel you daily. Implementing daily and committing daily will create a habit that will profoundly strengthen you to be there in times of difficulties.

I want to share with you a quick run down on my life today, and then how I re-fuel so I don't lose my shit in the midst of the insanity.

*We (Adam & I) are building our home OURSELVES.  It's a highly energy efficient/clean environmental home built with concrete & recycled Styrofoam. The interior is using trees from our own lot, that we have milled & planed ourselves. We also put in our own environmentally friendly septic system. No we didn't hire someone to do even that. It's an awesome undertaking for two people who have never built a whole house.

*My mom was recently diagnosed with Delusional Disorder. A rare form of Schizophrenia. As well as she just recently had a stroke. She has been hospitalized for 12 weeks now..It saddens me beyond words.

*Within the last 5 years, I got divorced, moved away from my home town of 40 years, and lost my job and changed jobs (much less pay).

*I started my own Coaching Practice based on life isn't perfect, embrace and accept it anyways concept. It's life, it goes on... It's also imperfectly beautiful, thus the name Wabi-Sabi.

Crazy, chaotic that's life. Does that mean we have to fall apart? Well, if you need the moment to cry your eyes out, scream at the top of your lungs that it's not fair. Do it!!!

When my sister in law was dying of brain cancer at 22, and leaving behind two very little boys and my brother...I can't even begin to tell you how many times I stood outside and balled beyond hysterics and begging god to save her. Or how many times I dropped to my knees and just asked god to give me the strength and grace to be there so she could leave knowing we would all be alright.

Some where in the middle of the darkest time of my life I started tenderheartedly the process of nurturing my inner soul.

I want to offer some of the ways that I still to this day nurture me, so that when times get tough, I have the strength to be there for those I love, and not lose myself in the process.

*I had always been a journal writer. I began doing it daily, not just when I had a minute.

*I started saying Thank you at the end of every day, no matter what sadness that day brought.

*I started every morning with gratitude for having one more day to kiss her cheek. Today I am grateful for all my hardships, what they taught me and how strong I have become. I am blessed with such love around me.(Tears of JOY).

*It was also in this deep sadness that I took a meditation class. I fell in love with the silence. The not having to think, or be, or do. I can't describe how profound this process has been for me. Over the years I have faced resistance but still even if for 15 minutes I do it. Through some help of a really cool friend, I have actually begun to work through that resistance, and am falling more in love with my silent moments every day.

*I have learned to pay me first. In time and monetary value. It's called self-respect, self-care and the truest form of self-love. I'm not rich, but I am rich enough to give to myself the luxury of "PLAY TIME". I make time to make jewelry, and collages. Because they float my boat. It sustains me! I also allow myself the gift of delicious coffee. We all have our loves, and mine is Jamaican me crazy, from Coffee By Designs. Check em' out! You will be hooked.

*Nurture with Nature ~ My two biggest loves during the spring, summer and fall, Fishing & Gardening. If something has to give to make time to connect with nature and play in the dirt, or dig for worms, I promise YOU I will not feel guilty. I know what makes me smile from the inside out.

*Even when I am working on a project, I fill my space with what I love. Great music, uplifting art work, colors of sunshine. I believe in filling my world with small gestures that make me smile

*I collect rocks from everywhere! This and books are my two most serious addictions. Every corner, bookshelf, holding my dish-soap bottle, door stops, gardens, my car console, the pocket of my jackets...You will find a rock, because the moment I touch it, it brings me back to my center. I feel connected to something bigger than me and it fills my soul.

If I truly could bottle up a recipe for inner serenity, peace, calm, joy and happiness, I would give it away free, by the bushels.  But since that is far beyond my power, the most I can offer is a simple recipe for living in the moment. One that will nurture your inner self so that when life get's tricky, you have the tools to remain strong.

Try adding some of the above tools/self-love into your daily routine and see if it brings strength, clarity, peace and joy. Nothing is an over night success, so I wouldn't go thinking if I do this today, tomorrow will improve in leaps and bounds. It's like any habit, 21 days at-least to change your mindset, see an improvement, notice your heart muscles getting stronger.

Feel free to suggest other awesome ways to nurture your soul, or share your profound stories of triumphs! I love, love, love hearing how beautiful souls over come, get back on track, stay strong, and create a dynamic life despite the ups and downs that get handed to us.

S.W.A.K.I.S.S. (keep it simple sunshine)
Shelley

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